Spring Equinox Maddness

Spring equinox drives me to be crazy, scattered, fearful ad doubtful.  Full of fear vs. faith.  There seem to be a disconnect in the universe between people, commitments and communication.  My creative artist side is on fire a blaze and out of control. idea’s coming at me like burst of flames.  I try to hose them down and at least capture one to put out on paper or into motion but all the other flames are just too big to focus on one. I panic, get aggitated and annoyed with myself and the world.  I judge myself against others who appear have it all figure out.

So I go back to my resources of books, meditations and mantra’s to find faith and peace.

Life is life.  You gotta meet “life on life’s terms.” AA slogan

“Seek refuge in inner calm, free your thought from the external world and you will feel the rays of Gods goodness and love during over you and the universe.”    Iranshahr

Mantra “I give myself the power and strength in my body to overcome my mind when I feel weak, depressed, or moody.  Together, my mind and body are a perfect team to provide me strength to conquer the day and my life.”

Meditation:

Take 5 long deep breaths seated or lying down.

Visualize the color of purple at the 3rd eye between the brows.

All your attention and energy goes towards it like an absorption or devouring.

The 3rd eye becomes a sea aninimae undulating energy. Absorbing your thoughts and fears. 

Visualize and feel the energy of absorption flow down to your heart center.

Your heart space feels full and expansive as the breath travels and fills your low belly, across the lungs widening your center.

Place your hands here.

Now you feel ease and can see through the crazy.

You see purpose and passion for your gifts from God. Faith.

The energy travels lower and pervades your hips where the 2nd chakra of create lives and suddenly you feel well being and wholeness.

Stay here for minutes and visualize what that is what it looks like, feels and live as if it is so right now.

Experience your desires as if it is happening right now.

It is happening right now. 

The ego and self will and esteem have stopped scattering like wild flames.

Now I am with my highest self, centered and one with God. 

I breathe in and say it is so.

Open you eyes and begin again your day.

Did you know stress and anxiety can shrink your brain and deteriorate your body?

I have chosen this year to break open my core wounds that have been with me since my childhood.  Not fucking comfortable stuff that is causing me to feel them all over again- creating fear, anxiety, depression and stress on my mind/body and spirit.  This is the “work” many will call it when you decide enough is enough and the old patterns and habits that have “worked” are not working any more.  This is yoga living off the mat.  This is AA’s 12 step process towards healing.  This is in many religions when you take on fully trusting in your higher power and surrendering.  It takes certain characteristics like humility, courage and the will to suffer in order to get better.

Now I am not saying to put yourself through this without guidance, therapy, etc. What I am saying is stress is a very real thing and choosing how to deal with it and how long it will affect you have some serious side effects.

So here is what is going on in your body and mind when you go through something like this.  There is a feedback loop in the brain, the anxiety tells it to replay the memory and in doing so takes over much of the thoughts going on in your mind. The new information coming in doesn't have a lot of space to settle in; therefore, you may even experience not remembering new memories, suffer learning new things, and other functions. That sucks! The fear based memories are so powerful they actually shrink your brain, especially the hippocampus. In turn you suffer from more anxiety, possibly depression, and can lead to Alzheimers in the end.  This is why you and I must not let the anxiety, depression and fear dictate our life and our destiny.

Your body knows when your mind is stressed, happy, angry and all the other emotions you feel.  In fact your body reacts with your emotions releasing hormones to go along with what your mind is feeling. For example, when you feel love oxytocin is released giving you a sensation of feeling good all over like the “chills or warm fuzzies”.  Your body, when feeling love and safety, can even emote with open arms wanting to express with a hug to share how good you feel.  When you are stressed you get the opposite hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline, causing your heart rate to increase, your blood pressure to rise, your breath to become shallow and the body literally takes on a defense looking posture.

You must MOVE!  Exercise is proven to relieve muscle tension, increase serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine; all of your feel good hormones.  Aerobic exercise lights up all the areas of the brain especially in the frontal cortex and hippocampus, helping you change the memories or feed back loop.  In fact the number one way to get all in one dose is the practice of yoga, a moving meditation with absorption of self at the end.  You see it all comes back to you and being centered.  And it’s a daily practice.

The Right Timing

The Right Timing

The last couple of months I have been struggling with making decisions. Waiting for the universe to give me a sign.  Procrastinate.  Blame it on timing, the moon is, if Mercury is retrograde or if I make a mistake!  Now I ask, is there such a thing as the “right timing”? 

After all that mindless shit I find myself in doubt, fear that it won’t work out or if I don’t act right now then I will miss out.

These all have one thing in common, TRUST.

When you trust the unviverse or God, Spirit, something bigger and greater than you…you just might let go of the intense feelings.

I have had mnay opportunities to try and manipulate “right timing” like:

·      Willing myself to do it.  Pushing the deal to go through like making a wedding happen when I wanted.

·      Freeze: not do anything, no efforts that are even positive, denial.

·      Procrastinating:  fear of failure or success, perfectionism, leading me to not change my career when I wanted to.

These are human behaviors based upon learned or innate characteristics dependent upon core beliefs.

You can change it with some tools with some practice.

TRUST the universe, God, a higher power to help.  Demand it.

Gather resources: educate yourself on the topic or characteristic you are struggling with.  See your strengths and your weaknesses. Books, Youtube, the world wide web where you know you are not alone.

The first step in all of this is positive action by admitting your doubts and fears.

FEARS = false evidence appearing real

Weakness = strength as this a golden opportunity for you to change, grow and evolve.

Meditate on this:

I accept my doubts and fears.

The right timing for “blank” is directly related to my union with universal flow.

See yourself, visualize yourself doing the thing you want with total universal support.

Sit with the thoughts, observe your immediately feelings.  Use your senses like hearing the noises of where you might be in this change, smell the space, sense how others are around you there.

Observe your immediate reactions:

·      Do you feel anthing?

·      Anxiety, fear, sadness, joy, ease, powerful, awesome

The primary feelings you feel come from your highest self and intuition.  These are great gifts so use them.

Trust “right timing” with practice and allow the universe to support your highest good. 

When balance doesn't exist...

My crazy side when I let loose, dance and be free!

Today I am grateful, it’s the weekend! What a week or two I have had. Keeping my head above water, trying to get out of my head, and staying vertical has been a challenge. Too many roles and obligations I try to fill all the time. It is my own choice, as I act like the man in my relationship with myself. Well the "man" is tired and the "woman" needs to be seen and heard and most of all loved. All my life I have had to be more masculine in order to defend myself, stay in control when things were not due to family and financial distress.  Today my life is good, to most it probably seen awesome.  But inside deep down in the old wounds and mental patterns I still behave like it’s a struggle.  The struggle is real for most and me.  It is time for softness, the return of the feminine goddess we all have, even men, to show herself. 

BALANCE ladies, take a step back and be soft.  Allow others to help you just as much as you do. 

My week of self-love and BALANCE has been a journey. This is not a "pity party" story but a reminder to give back to yourself just as much as you give. Otherwise you just fucking break down. Monday I locked myself in to my house away from pollen and into movies. I never do that! Tuesday massage with Justin Rockett and had my whole arm taped due to tendonitis that just won't stop because I won't stop.... Wednesday went to an epic session with Elena Zaphara Bensonoff who guided me back to my feminine spirit (she is amazing if you have not been with her before!!!) Then held a group discussion at house with amazing women regarding balance with Charna Kety, Lindsey Kelly Finer, Kelly Breeding, Tristan Reiber, Bridgett O'Meara Yoga, and few others. Thursday had another massage with James Truitt and movement with Moses Bernard for one last playtime together. Friday taught yoga with my ladies Bella Prana Yoga and Meditation and off to Kodawari Studios for an epic deprivation float tank experience to mediate for an hour. Off to sleep I went. Thank you to all who support me on my journey. And much love to all of those who need LOVE.

The Philosophy Behind MOVE

The Philosophy Behind MOVE

Our bodies are amazing machines. They are designed to be able to move in all directions, to defend against the unexpected, and to be able to contract force. In addition to all of the work, our body is also designed for rewarding experiences- to be intimate, to express feelings and to sleep for extended periods of time.

In todays’ fast-paced society, it appears to me that we have created a habit of separating our bodies from our minds and spirits, inevitably creating dis-ease and imbalance. Working with my clients and even in myself, I witness breakdowns from the defeats of these imbalances. I feel that we need to get back to making the mind-body connection in order to get real and see real change.

If you want to see real change, it has to start with you. No one can do this for you. So what is it going to take to get you to MOVE? What is it going to take for you to be motivated enough to make changes from the very core values you have and see it as a holistic approach to a lifestyle. Because that is exactly what MOVE is- A holistic approach of you looking at YOU as mind, body, spirit and all the juicy stuff in between. The training never stops and the diet never ends. This isn’t about weight loss or a quick fix. This is about lifestyle.  And your life depends on it.

The honesty and vulnerability it takes to really see through all of your

“stuff”- your denial, your excuses- will show up in your body. Your

body, just like your mind and heart, has a history. The body talks,

stores emotions, and reacts even if you were trying your hardest in

your mind to stop it. Your body hears every word you say out loud

and inside. You have to get real honest with what you are telling

yourself and if it is congruent with your goals. Are you treating yourself the way you want to turn out? If you are telling

yourself often “I am fat” then your body is going to accept it. That’s the truth.

Change doesn’t happen overnight. I like to tell my clients to envision this new lifestyle as a journey. Reflect on a journey you had in the past; something you never thought you could do or get through. It could be marriage, divorce, death of a loved one, having kids, graduating college, or starting a career. Then look at where you are now. You did do it. You were able to get through it. And you can do this as well. It isn’t going to be easy. There will be challenges. You are going to have to dig deep and get honest with yourself. Figure out what you want and go for those deep desires of your mind, body, and heart.  And then, with my guidance and support, we can embark on this journey together.

Body weight exercise is a great way to train your body for every day life stuff. A workout at the end too!

Paddle Boarding is tough, just carrying the board down to the water with a strong breeze can throw you off balance and jar your back.  So we need to train our bodies to move functionally for everything and here is why!

Body weight exercise is the easiest way to build strength, muscle, and stability for your body.  You don’t have to go anywhere but right where you are with your own “machine” which is YOU.  By using your own body weight for strength, you are able to recruit many muscles at one time therefore burning more calories, turning fat into muscle efficiently, and sculpting many areas at one time.  Sounds great doesn’t it? 

Here are a few other great reasons to train with your body weight:

·      You trip or miss a step on your staircase.  Answer: your skillful with lunges and jump lunges so your body quickly remembers the motion and saves you from a bad fall down the stairs

·      A heavy box has fallen over in the garage when you were organizing.  Answer:  you squat low, push deep into your legs and heels and push the box out of the way or even lift to desired place without straining your back.

·      Your child is getting really heavy and still wants you to carry him/her at 5 years old.  Answer: those pull ups you have been working on really come in handy here to lift the child up.  The squats and lunges have built strength in your legs and back.  The push ups have made your strong to the core to care dead weight easily.

So what is stopping you from a great workout daily with your very own body? 

Here is a quick routine to get you going:

Squats hip distance apart 20 reps

Lunges forward 20 reps each leg

Push ups 15 reps full plank or knee’s down

Hold and isolate plank 30-60 seconds

Side lunges lateral 20 reps each leg

Plea squats 20 reps

Burpee’s 10-15 reps

Reverse table top tricep dips, bend elbows 15 reps

Jump squats 15 reps

Repeat from the top 2 more times